It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. This week's offering is a skittish character who tends to be a freethinker. While this may be a good thing at times, long term this manager may not be a good bet to survive within the morass that is corporate inertia.

MOTW: Buck the Trend Manager

Watches a lot of movies and television, especially fare that features rogue cops, vigilante citizens and/or general anti-establishment characters. Has a reputation for going against whatever corporate strategy, policy or procedure is mandated by Head Office. Working for Buck the Trend Manager can have serious and undesired, short-term repercussions for your career.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. What is it that many people in different parts of history said in their defense. "I was following orders." Well, this manager actually was.

MOTW: Lackey Manager

This manager survives by doing anything and everything Senior Management says without question. Lackey Manager’s silhouette has a distinct stooped contour to it from all the weight of nonsensical orders that he/she has complied with over the years. At home Lackey Manager’s spouse, children and even pets order him/her around with relative ease. When alone, Lackey Manager stills looks around at non-existent beings for permission before doing anything at all.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. No one knows why the company employs this next manager, but then if they did, it wouldn't be a mystery now would it?

MOTW: Mysterious Manager

A shadowy figure, Mysterious Manager comes in at odd hours and leaves at even odder ones. He/she sits in the corner office and spends a lot of time speaking on the phone in hushed tones. Is never observed going to lunch and when seen in the hall is jocular, but never really connects with anyone.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. What is that saying? "Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean they are not out to get you." Someone should tell this next manager that. It might be reassuring for him/her.

MOTW: Paranoid Manager

Afraid of his/her own shadow, this manager rarely leaves his/her office and only does so when summoned by Senior Management. When the summons comes Paranoid Manager assumes the worst and already has half of his/her desk cleaned out by the time he/she hangs up the phone. Upon a chance encounter with Conspiracy Manager, Paranoid Manager usually implodes because of all the negative implications upon his/her corporate survivability a conversation with Conspiracy Manager will typically reveal.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. This next manager could use a regular supply of energy drinks, but rarely indulges in them.

MOTW: Dozing Off Manager

Typically a specimen that is getting on in years, one can set one’s watch by this next manager’s nap schedule. Dozing Off manager regularly saws wood during the work day at specific times in the morning and after lunch. This manager’s demise typically comes when a meeting is scheduled with an important senior manager at the time of one of Dozing Off Manager’s precisely scheduled power naps. Since he/she cannot keep his/her eyes open at this critical time, the only recourse is to claim that he/she suffers from narcolepsy and hope for the best. This defense strategy rarely works.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. Everyone has heard of this next manager. Finally, his/her role is explained. Or is it?

MOTW: Matrix Manager

Most people who work in a large multinational company have had one of these at some point in their careers, but what is a Matrix Manager and what does a Matrix Manager do? The answer is no one really knows. Typically this manager appears above you in a remote part of the organizational chart. You are depicted several layers below him/her connected by a dotted line path with many twists and turns resembling some child’s random twirling of the knobs on an Etch-a-Sketch . This manager rarely interacts with you, doesn’t really know what you do, but at review time opines on your performance and gets some indeterminate say on your raise and bonus. Eventually your matrix manager moves on and is replaced by another, even less connected and more remote Matrix Manager whom you hope to eventually speak with at some point within the next performance management cycle.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. You probably feel sorry for this next manager. It is normal to feel that way. It is probably not the best idea to hang out with him/her though. It may not be good for your career prospects. 

MOTW: Lonely Manager

A melancholy figure, this manager has no friends, no acquaintances, not even people who claim Lonely Manager owes them money. This manager eats lunch alone and at meetings the seats around him/her are always empty. How he/she survived the interview process and was promoted is a mystery to all. Lonely Manager is thinking of taking up smoking just to see if by chance he/she can rub elbows with others in the communal smoking area.

It's Monday

And we all know what that means. Time for another MOTW, Manager of the Week. If you ever watched America's Most Wanted or Unsolved Mysteries you may have seen this next Manager.

MOTW: Wanted Manager

A shifty character, this manager screens all phone calls and immediately ducks into the rest room when unexpected visitors arrive at the office. Rumors are rampant about his/her checkered past, but they are all moot as Wanted Manager’s career is suddenly terminated by a visit from the U.S. Marshals.